2x07 - Enter the Dragon
♪ Hear the legends of the Kung Fu Panda! ♪
♪ Doo-doo-doo-doo doo-bom doo boom-boom! ♪
♪ Raised in a noodle shop ♪
♪ never seeking glory or fame ♪
♪ he climbed the mountain top ♪
♪ and earned the Dragon Warrior name. ♪
♪ Hu! Ah! Ya! ♪
♪ Kung Fu Panda! ♪
♪ Doo-doo-doo-doo- sho-bom, doom-doom-doom! ♪
♪ Master Shifu saw the warrior blossom ♪
♪ and master the skills of bodacious and awesome ♪
♪ Kung Fu Panda. ♪
♪ Doo-doo-doo-doo doom-doom-doom-doom! ♪
♪ He lives, he trains ♪
♪ and he fights with the Furious Five ♪
♪ protect the Valley somethin' somethin' ♪
♪ somethin' somethin' alive ♪
♪ Oh! Ah! Uh! ♪
♪ Kung Fu Panda ♪
♪ Legends of awesomeness. ♪
Sweet!
[flute music]
sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ addic7ed.com ~
The sacred peach tree of heavenly wisdom
has overlooked the Valley of peace for centuries.
But for much of that time, the Valley was anything but peaceful.
[wind rustling]
Demons of the underworld ruled,
and anyone who dared enter their Valley was driven off... or worse.
Until the day came when someone dared to stand against the demons,
a young tortoise named Oogway.
What none of us knew was that within Oogway
burned a powerful life force.
A gift from the universe bestowed once every generation...
the Hero's Qi.
[energy zaps, demons growl]
[energy zaps]
Oogway was able to drive the demons back to the underworld
and use his Hero's Qi to seal the way behind.
[rumbling]
[shimmering tone]
[fireworks bursting]
But one demon remained,
stronger, smarter, and faster than the others.
His name... Ke-pa.
Thirsting for vengeance,
Ke-pa relentlessly attacked exhausted Oogway.
At last, the demon was ready to strike the final, fatal blow.
At that moment, however, something magical happened.
As Oogway had protected the Valley of peace,
the Peach tree now protected Oogway.
The powers of heaven and Earth blasted forth from the tree,
overcoming Ke-pa's demon power.
[explosion]
Stripped of his might, Ke-pa swore revenge and fled,
the power of the Peach tree keeping him trapped in a mortal body...
the body of a pig.
Well, hang on a second. You're Ke-pa?
That's right.
[slurps quietly]
[laughter]
[ominous music]
[scatting] [vocalizing]
You're the best, Dragon Warrior.
[scatting]
- Ooh! Thank you, Po. - Whoo!
[scatting] [gasps]
- Are they here yet? - Mm-mm.
[scatting]
[panting]
- Po! Test us! - Okay.
I'll give you a hard one this time.
I didn't cross the hinterlands of Jao Dzuh...
Ooh. That's you beating Temutai with an improvised fighting style
based on your tempestuous friendship with princess Mei Li.
Oddly specific, but yes!
Help! Somebody help!
Later, guys! Gots to do what I does.
[giggling]
[scatting]
[gros] [coins clinking]
See, guys? That's how you do a robbery.
Quick and painless. [laughs]
Wouldn't be too sure about the "painless" part.
Darn it!
Gah! Aah!
[screams] [groans]
♪ Kickedy lak-da! Punchedy whack-ah! ♪
[groans]
- Are they here now? - Mm-mm.
[groans] [grunting]
Ow.
[groans]
[all groan]
Ooh.
You're the panda, Po! [laughs]
- You okay? - [high-pitched] Fine.
[grunts, sighs]
[weakly scatting]
[scatting loudly]
- They gotta be here now. - Sorry, Dragon Warrior.
Gah!
Will you sign my chest?
Just look at him making a fool of himself.
[landing blow]
Po's just having fun. Why shouldn't he enjoy the attention? [groans]
By getting caught up in being the Dragon Warrior,
Po is losing sight of what made him the Dragon Warrior.
[wind rustling]
Huh?
[mysterious humming] [groans]
- Master Shifu! - I thought we'd have more time.
The tree!
[landing blow] [groans]
[laughter]
[groans] Hmph.
Looks like the king of the demons isn't so tough.
[wind rustles]
[ominous music]
[deeper voice] The tree. It's dying.
[indistinct chatter, cheering]
And I call this one the two buns of granite!
[metallic clanking] All: Ooh.
[gasps]
Po, they're here! They're here!
[gasps]
Sweet!
[gasps] [shudders]
I've worked my whole life for this one moment.
And now, it's finally here!
[crowd gasps]
My own officially licensed, factory-made, mint condition
Dragon Warrior action figures with seam!
Look at me. I'm awesome.
[cheers]
- He is pretty awesome. - Then why don't you marry him? Gah!
I gotta go show these to Shifu and the guys!
[cheering]
[vocalizing]
I'm sorry, but that's the way it is.
Guys! Guys! You gotta see these and...
Hey, what happened to the Peach tree?
It's dying.
But I assume you already knew that, what with all
the meditating you said you've been doing up here.
Uh, may have slightly exaggerated
the amount of said meditationage.
I guess you've been pretty busy catering to your adoring fans.
Well, people loves themselves some Dragon Warrior, so...
Oh, oh, oh! Totally forgot!
I finally achieved my number one dream!
- Humility? - It's me! [clatters]
Hey! I mean, sure, it's not an exact likeness,
- but, I mean... - Leave us.
You all know what you have to do.
Guys? Where are they going?
To prepare the antiquities of the Jade Palace for transport.
Wh... why?
The knowledge and wisdom within must endure
in case we are unable to stop him.
Stop who?
[landing blow, thud]
[wood splintering]
I feel... good.
It's starting to return to me.
When the tree dies, I'll be back to my full power.
Keep the change.
The demons shall reclaim the land that was stolen from us.
We shall conquer the Valley of peace,
then all of China, and finally, the world.
Who... who are you talking to?
[indistinct chatter]
Shifu!
Whoa, wha... wait, will you?
Excuse me, that... [pot shatters]
Oh! [gasps]
- Hang on! - What is it?
Since when do we run away from a fight?
We've never confronted a foe as powerful as Ke-pa.
But I assume you already knew that,
what with all the studying of the sacred scrolls
- you said you've been doing. - Okay, maybe I've been slacking off
on my meditating and studying and training,
but there's more to being the Dragon Warrior
- than all that stuff. - Like what?
You saw the action figures, right?
Don't you think you're overreacting a smidge?
We've never fought anyone like Ke-pa?
Well, Ke-pa's never fought anyone like me.
I'll be all, "wahh!"
And he'll be all, "whoa, ooh!"
- Po. - I'll be all, like...
[shrieking energetically]
And he'll be, like... [painful groans]
Po! [figurine clatters]
Great time to be playing with dolls. What's next, master Shifu?
Hey! [figuring shatters]
Since Ke-pa is most likely on his way to free the other demons, we have to...
Hang on. If this guy wants to free the demons,
won't he go to that mountain Oogway sealed up?
Don't you study at all?
Oogway built the Jade Palace on top of the seal to keep it safe.
What? The demons are here?
You'll all head out in different directions.
Our only hope is that one of you
intercepts Ke-pa before the Peach tree dies
and he reaches his full strength.
But under no circumstances are you to fight him alone.
Only as a group will we have a chance.
Sound your horn should you find him,
and the rest of us will come running.
Or flying.
Oh! They know what I mean. Now go!
- Panda! Not you. - Huh?
I need you to go tell the villagers
to pack up and run for their lives.
Make them understand even the Dragon Warrior
is no match for Ke-pa.
Uh, isn't that kind of bad for my image?
- I mean... - This isn't a joke, panda!
Do you think I give a flying fig about your precious image?
Fig?
This Ke-pa can't be all that tough,
otherwise Shifu would've sent me with the others.
Uh, Po? Oh, Po.
You haven't been around the noodle shop lately.
Be great if you could come by and shake some hooves.
May have to put that on hold, Dad.
Everybody! I've got something to tell you!
- Yeah! - Ooh!
Is it the story of how you beat Tai Lung?
Oh, no! Tell about when you defeated lord Shen!
No, no, no. Those were pretty cool, but...
Pretty cool? You never lose, Po.
You beat Hundun... [cheering]
Scorpion. [cheering]
Fung and the croc bandits!
[cheering reluctantly]
Huh? I guess I kind of haven't ever lost to anyone.
- That is so cool. - Oh, very cool.
So what did you want to tell us, Po?
Oh. Uh, you all have to know...
Yes?
You have to know... um...
[suspenseful music]
That whenever evil should rear its ugly evilly head,
your unbeatable Dragon Warrior will never let you down!
[cheering]
- Isn't anyone going to welcome Ke-pa? - Ke-pa?
- Wait. You're Ke-pa? - In the flesh. Such as it is.
[chuckles]
That's a good one.
[laughs]
I really thought that... [laughs]
Get this guy. He says he's Ke-pa.
[laughter]
[laughs] Who's Ke-pa?
You know, for a second, I...
[shouts]
[groans]
[all gasp]
Okay, wasn't quite ready there. But now it's my turn.
[crowd cheering] Yeehaw!
[grunting]
[groans]
[all cheering]
Whoa!
What? No more titters?
No tee-hees? Guffaws?
Not a chortle to be had?
[short chuckle]
Sorry. Sometimes I laugh when I get nervous.
[giggles]
Okay. This is your last chance to surrender.
I appreciate the offer, but I'm going to have to pass.
[whooshing air] Whoa!
Oh! Ooh.
[panting]
[screams]
"Dragon Warrior." It's kind of catchy.
Must remember that.
If you'll all excuse me, I'm just going to run upstairs
and see some old friends.
- Take your time, guy. - Oh, I'll be back.
And then we can get down to the real fun.
Seriously, guy, take your time.
Oh, son, are you okay? Wake up.
[groaning]
- Where's Ke-pa? - He said he had to run upstairs.
[gasps] The tree!
Just hold on for a little bit longer.
Talking to a tree? You need serious help.
Ke-pa!
[grunts]
Finally, someone recognizes me.
Ya!
So, tree, you really are dying.
[blows horn]
Huh?
[gasps]
Don't any of you know when to give up?
Not really our thing.
Now put my master down before you make me mad.
Ooh. Wouldn't want that to happen.
[groans]
I think you and I got off on the wrong foot.
I tell you what.
Take your best shot, and we'll call it even.
Po! [shouts] Don't!
[grunts] [groans]
[gasps] [gasps]
Hmm.
Oopsy. Now you've done it.
Uh-oh.
[rumbling]
[ominous music]
[cracking sounds]
[sinister laugh]
[sparks crackle]
[deep electrical hum]
Wow! We beat him!
[scatting]
- Panda. - I mean, yeah.
Technically he fell off a cliff, but we still won.
- Panda. - Another big victory for the Dragon Warrior.
Po, it isn't over.
[growling]
[deep rumbling]
[growls]
[horn squeaks weakly]
Behold! The real Dragon Warrior!
Now this is more like it.
[screams]
Hot butt! Hot butt!
Hot butt! [groaning]
[exhales]
- Where'd he go? - The Jade Palace. No!
- Who blew their horn? - No blow here.
- Wasn't me. - Not me.
Where are Shifu and Po?
- Get outta there! - Hey!
Look! By the Peach tree!
[Po and Shifu shouting in distance]
Hi! Good to see you too!
They're in a chipper mood.
[distant shouting] Hey! Ke-pa's coming!
Ke-pa's coming!
Ke-pa is here.
[thunderclap]
Jump!
[screams]
[explosion] Both: Aah!
[coughs] No.
[coughs]
No!
Guys? Where are they? Can you see them?
[distant shouting, groaning]
There they are!
[ominous music]
[rumbling]
And now, it's time to unleash the demons' fury upon the world.
[straining]
Oogway really got this on tight.
[force field hums]
Hmm. Of course.
Oogway sealed it with his Hero's Qi.
So, I must need the Hero's Qi to unseal it.
Hmm.
Guys!
Are you all right? [ground rumbling]
Not for long!
Where is the Hero's Qi?
And remain calm!
My son, the Dragon Warrior, will know what to do!
Run!
[all screaming]
[explosion]
[frightened screams]
[growls]
Work together, will you?
[screams]
[grunts]
All right! Now I can... Darn it!
Monkey, shore up that wall!
[evil laugh]
No!
[explosion]
How exciting was that?
We'll get right to business. I need the Hero's Qi.
And from what I know about Qi and balance
and harmony, blah, blah, blah,
is that when Oogway left,
the Universe passed the Hero's Qi to one of you.
Even if we knew, we'd never tell you.
Oh, I think you will. Because otherwise I'm going
to start gobbling up villagers by the clawful.
[all gasping]
Panda! You were supposed to evacuate the village.
Uh, yeah. Um, when I saw Ke-pa get to the village, I...
You saw him here? Why didn't you blow the warning horn?
Oh, well, uh, he was a pig, So I just thought...
- I thought I could handle it. - Oopsy.
One of our heroes isn't sounding all that heroic.
He's no Hero. He's a self-centered lout
who puts his own ego ahead of those that depend on him!
- Hey! That's not... - Really hate getting in the middle
of a family squabble here, but I am losing my patience!
I am the master of the Jade Palace. I have what you seek.
[groans]
Shifu!
I don't want to hear anything you have to say!
The lives of everyone here are in danger because of you!
- But... - Leave!
You're of no use to any of us!
Oh, a chance to watch you flee your own village,
drenched in shame... I love it.
[melancholy music]
[clattering]
Po!
Son, son, wait for me! Wait, wait!
All now bow down to me, your new Dragon Warrior.
[evil laugh]
Po? Po?
[sighs]
[panting]
- I gotta sit down for a second. - Fine. 'Cause we're here.
Wow. Great location for the new noodle shop, huh, son?
[laughs] Lucky this spot isn't taken.
Noodle shop?
You know, Po, this could really be good.
Just you, me, and noodles, like the old days before you got...
[stammering] ...well, you know.
[laughs] [vocalizing]
The lives of everyone here are in danger because of you.
Get out of my sight!
Flee your own village, drenched in shame and disgrace...
and disgrace... [echoing]
And now to get the Hero's Qi and release my demon brethren.
[thud] [groans]
- My family is trapped. - Shifu!
- Oh! - Oh!
[groans]
[pained groans]
That's it, keep it up.
Smash me to bits and the Hero's Qi will just dissipate and fly away.
You'll never be able to free the other demons.
You can't get it without...
Without what?
Oh! Without Zhuangzi's Funnel.
Zhuangzi's Funnel? Of course.
You there!
Now would you like to help or would you like to die?
Um, we were thinking maybe we could just, um, leave?
After helping?
Lock him up until I'm ready for him.
[groans]
- I'm worried about Shifu. - We've got to rescue him.
Not just that. I mean, the way he treated Po.
Po blew it. He had his head so far up
his action figure, he couldn't see straight.
But sending him away?
It doesn't seem like the right thing to do now.
Agreed. I don't want to go against Shifu,
but Po is the Dragon Warrior.
And to have any chance against Ke-pa,
we'll need all the help we can get. We need to get Po back.
[singing in foreign language]
- Son, is something wrong? - Is something wrong?
Really, Dad? Is something wrong?
You know what's wrong!
I lived at the Jade Palace. I had adoring fans.
I had factory-made action figures of me.
I hung out with Kung Fu masters, and now it's all gone.
And my friends and the whole village
and maybe China are in serious danger.
- So go save them. - What? Dad, it's impossible.
You're crazy. I can't beat Ke-pa.
Shifu doesn't even want me there.
I lost everything.
"Lost everything"? [laughs]
What are you talking about? Oh, me crazy?
Well, tell me, what did you have the day
you pulled a noodle cart up to the Jade Palace
and became the Dragon Warrior?
Fans? Action figurine thingys, huh?
- Fancy-pants friends? - No.
Yeah, and I'm pretty sure Shifu didn't want you there, huh?
Talk about impossible. But it turned out, ah...
It turned out you had everything you needed, son.
And... and here's the thing, son...
everything you had then, you've still got here.
Love took you up there. You loved Kung Fu.
What do you love now, Po?
Hmm?
- Hiya! - Gah! Come on!
Master, are you all right? I'm getting you out.
No!
[gate clanging] No?
I have a plan. There's a chance to take Ke-pa down.
As a group, I think you and the Five could defeat him.
Shifu, I know you're angry with him, but we need Po.
I'm sending Monkey and Crane to bring him back.
- What? No! - But he's valuable.
- He's too valuable. - I don't understand.
I didn't send him away because I'm angry.
Tigress, listen to me. I don't have the Hero's Qi.
Po does.
[gasps]
What? Po has the Hero's Qi? Really?
I sent him away to protect him and to protect us all.
If he returns and Ke-pa gets his Qi, all is lost.
What do we do?
Ke-pa must surround me with Zhuangzi's Funnel
and crush me to try to extract the Hero's Qi.
The Funnel's energy will make him weak. That's the moment you attack.
Very well. I'll... Wait. How will you survive that?
I won't.
As long as Ke-pa believes that I have the Hero's Qi,
he will be unable to release the demons.
We must keep Po away
and then take advantage of our opportunities.
An opportunity that will kill you. Master, I...
I know you are not one for emotional words, Tigress.
I also know that you, above all, understand the need for sacrifice.
Now go and get everyone ready.
- Where's Shifu? - He's staying there.
- What? Why? - Shifu's lost it. Let's go find Po.
No! Po coming back here is the worst thing that could happen.
What have I done?
[dramatic music]
Oh! [panting]
Po?
Po...
Hmm, that's my boy.
- Whoa, that's some barbecue. - They're building Zhuangzi's Funnel.
Ke-pa is going to use it to free the demons.
- By crushing Shifu? Really? - I'm afraid so.
Now when Ke-pa is weak, we attack.
This whole thing is a big circle of stink.
We have to do it. Understand?
We have to.
I'm sort of enjoying this extra effort, like I'm earning it.
It should make the release of my fellow demons
that much more enjoyable.
What? Nothing to say?
No pithy wisdom? No lofty moral judgments?
- What should happen, will. - Oh, I see.
Zen-like acceptance. Very mastery of you.
Well, Shifu, I couldn't agree more.
Your Ke-pa-ish-ness, sir.
What? [echoing]
Wow, that's like... that is a big, big sound.
One last piece and the Funnel is ready.
[evil laugh]
Release him!
[thud]
[warbling tone]
[scraping]
[groans]
[energy crackling]
[pained groans]
- Almost time. - Shifu!
- No! It's Po! - What do we do?
You all do as we planned. I'll get him away from here.
If this is gonna work, we need you too!
Just go!
[all shouting]
- Listen to me. - Tigress!
- We gotta to save Shifu! - No, we don't.
[grunts] [landing blow]
[shouts]
[snarls]
[growls]
[groans] Shifu!
Ah!
Tigress! I have to get through!
- No! Po, you don't... - Tigress, he's going to kill Shifu.
- I know. - Are you completely nuts?
- Po, listen! - No, you listen.
I gotta save Shifu! This is my fault.
Tigress, we need you!
[energy crackles]
[groans]
Ah!
Hah!
Keep attacking.
[landing blows]
[roars]
[landing blows]
[roars, rope snaps]
Oh, sure!
Attack a guy while he's in a trance, why don't you?
Well, you failed.
[groans]
And now that you're down, I can finally take you out.
[all groaning]
[groans]
Panda, no!
- I'm getting you out of here. - It's you.
- Yeah, Shifu, it's me. - No, panda, it's you.
What... what do you mean?
It's you. You have the Hero's Qi.
- I... - The panda!
[groans]
[evil laugh]
[grunting]
[explosion, crackling]
[all screaming]
[energy buzzing]
[gasps]
Huh?
[all gasping] Po!
[grunts]
[somber music]
[evil laugh]
Now, now my demon brethren, you are free!
[screeches]
[evil laugh]
Destroy them! Destroy them all!
Everyone, clear out!
[all screaming]
Master Shifu, we have to get out of here.
- I'm not leaving him! - Get the villagers to safety.
- Whatever it takes. - But what about...
Go!
[coughs]
- Po! - He's alive!
For now. With his Hero's Qi drained, he can't have much time.
- What can we do? - I don't know. I...
The Peach tree. The Peach tree!
[screaming]
[rumbling]
This is just the beginning.
Soon we'll have all of China, and then the world.
We'll wipe all mortals right off this planet.
[coughs]
Ow.
Master, look at it. The tree... the tree is dead.
Looks can be deceiving, Tigress.
The Peach tree saved Oogway in his time of need,
and now it will save Po.
[groans]
[wind rustles]
[gasps]
- I'm sorry, panda. - I'm the one who's sorry.
Don't speak, Po. Save your strength.
I have to say this. This was all my fault.
If I would've listened to you instead of...
- It's all right, panda. - No, it's not. I got confused.
I thought it was more important
to be treated like a hero than to act like one.
I just wish I had another... chance.
Po. Po!
It's over. Po is gone.
And Ke-pa has won.
[sighs]
[shimmering tone]
[gasps]
[shimmering tone]
It's a Peach tree sapling.
[shimmering tone]
It's restoring his life force... restoring his Hero's Qi.
[triumphant music]
- What'd I miss? - You're alive!
And I'm... I'm pleased about that.
[sighs]
Thanks. [laughs] But I feel weird.
Look out!
[energy hums]
[gasps] Awesome!
The Peach tree not only restored your Qi,
it greatly enhanced it.
Whoa! What do I do with it?
- Save the world. - Cool.
[all screaming]
Hey. How you doin'?
The panda. Alive? How?
Uh, not sure.
Some kind of weird magicky, mystical thing.
Anyway, check this out.
[energy hums]
The Hero's Qi. Attack him!
Devour him! Destroy him!
Ah!
[grunting]
Ah! Too many!
Whoa!
- Po, they're following you. - Then let 'em follow!
- He needs help. - Wait.
You hungry? Come and get it.
Wa-ta!
[rumbling]
This might be a good time to take cover.
[screaming]
[explosion]
[sighs]
Defeating a demon horde takes it out of you.
No!
Oh! [grunts]
I swear by all that's dark and vile,
this day will see the end of the Dragon Warrior.
[grunts, groans]
- Po! - His Hero's Qi! He's drained it.
[warbling tone]
[groans]
Ow!
Aah! [laughs]
[screams] Oof!
[gasping]
[pained screaming]
[thunderclap]
[energy crackling] [groaning]
No! This can't happen.
You're a worm, an ant, a mortal!
You got that right. And on behalf of all mortals,
I say to you... skadoosh.
[explosion]
And so as Po had protected the Valley of peace,
the Peach tree now protected Po.
Don't know that I really need a legend
and all that, Shifu. [laughs]
We're safe again, thanks to the Peach tree.
No. Thanks to you, Po.
It was your selfless act that saved us.
Dad?
- Dad! - Oh, son! [laughs]
- I brought what you asked me to. - Excellent.
Po, I have something I wanna show you.
Ha! Thanks, but I... I'm not really sure I want that.
Doesn't seem them very important anymore.
Who said it was for you?
This one is mine.
[flute music]
sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ addic7ed.com ~